Paul Comerford

2021 A Racing the Reaper Man Year

Some months ago, I wrote the Introduction to my book, Racing the Reaper Man which I am initially serialising on this website, and will add to as time progresses. To make it authentic for my target readers in the 50 – 60+ age groups, I had always planned to use 2023 as the year in which I literally lived all of my own methods ‘live’, to underpin the advice in the book. After this I would pull the book together for publishing in a viable format. That target year would see me in retirement, so I could focus without other commitments. But, life is not that simple.

2020 became the most bizarre year of the century. The Covid-19 pandemic’s effect will be remembered by all the generations who lived it. It was no different for me. Working from home and spending around 10 months out of 12 in isolation, I found my enforced solo lifestyle had stealthily ingrained some destructive habits. To those on the outside looking in, I was a healthy living, dedicated runner, but that was only partially true. To paraphrase Dean Karnazes, I had become so comfortable, I was miserable. So it prompted me to use 2021 as a new start, even though the pandemic was still firmly in control.

As I ground out 141 miles in December to reach my 2020 target of a nice, round 1000, the bad habits I had allowed to affect my daily life became an unwanted burden. Circumstances had put me in the right place to make 2021 the perfect Racing the Reaper Man Year. My daily mileage from 27th December was: 6; 10; 10; 10; 6. I had a momentum I did not want to break, so on January 1st 2021 grasped the nettle. As I state in my book’s introduction, I had ‘pressed the reset’.

Serendipitously, coinciding with this dynamic decision, my Personal Trainer, Martin Sorenson, needed a long-time subject for his MSc dissertation. As my goals of losing weight, strengthening my core, improving speed and training for 3 ultramarathons fit his requirements, we formed a partnership. My book and Martin’s MSc became the focal point we both needed. It also reduced any chance of a way out for either of us, so we are committed.

2020 – The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

Until the Covid-19 Pandemic took hold, I was still commuting to London three days a week. My life had structure. I had control of food intake and alcohol consumption. In 2015 I had reached a point of fitness where I could run 28 miles in under 4:45:00 in training. My low point in life during 2008 was behind me. I’d dropped from a peak of 16 stones, to 12 stones and 7 pounds. I hit 2016 travelling in hope, but little did I know I had 3 years of illness and turmoil ahead. Minor bad habits became major crutches and the after effects of severe illness and a course of Ciprofloxacin saw me dealing with various tendon pains until the end of 2020. Last year was to be my first year clear of major issues, but, of course, life has a way of confounding one. 

Lockdown, from March, became a two-edged sword. I had no need to commute, but also lost 15 hours a week reflection and reading time. The train was my reading and writing place. It allowed me to dream of many things. Working at home meant I was always in the office, and Covid-19 was also part of my risk management role, so the pressure was sustained and relentless. I could never shut off as my decisions always had long term ramifications – I had to keep people safe. I had a bit of a crisis in April as the unrelenting pressure left me emotionally shattered. Yet, I rallied with the coming of spring and slipped into a comfortable routine that encompassed my best and worst habits.

16 weeks of isolation were eased by taking to my local trails. I did long runs of up to 20 miles in the sunshine, and set about exploring every local footpath I could find. I ran up onto the chalk downs and scuttled around the coastal trails. I introduced more core work and maintained a reasonable level of fitness. That I was in good shape for a 63-year-old was enough, and turning 64 was no issue. However, my two ultra marathon debut races had been cancelled, so I had no real goal and slipped into a daily cycle that may surprise a lot of people. I drank an average of 31 units of alcohol a week! The calories I burned running barely balanced the excessive intake of booze. Running had become an enabler to pour alcohol down my throat and stuff convenience junk food snacks into my face. 

Looking at my training log for the year, several statistics jumped out at me:

1. My alcohol consumption of around 1630 units worked out as 96,000+ kcal.
2. That added around 2000 kcal of useless input to my weekly intake.
3. Without that I would be around 14lbs lighter.
4. My barrel chest was also a barrel gut.
5. That 1000 miles was achieved in spite of not running at all for 195 separate days!
6. My diet still included lots of junk, even though I do not eat meat.
7. I achieved my running in constant hangover recovery.
8. I was underachieving and unhappy with how I felt.
9. My health recovery had paused at the altar of perceived comfort.
10. The ‘comfort’ was not real – I was often depressed.
11. My habits gave a bad example and enabled others not to get fit.

2020 – the final 42 miles to The Reset

A six miler, three 10 milers in a row and a final six: I’d reached my 1000.  Every mile I was in deep thought, but over those 5 days I still consumed 43.6 units of booze! I was sick of alcohol, but poured it in every evening; then, the next day, ground out those miles. Yet, for once, it was considered: I had been reading, strategising and planning. By New Year’s Eve I had juxtaposed how I felt against what I desired. I knew January 1st 2021 would be a very new start.

I had initially had a rough idea as to what I wanted to achieve in 2021. Then, I read Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall’s new book, Eat Better Forever. I collect cookery books of favourite authors, and usually skim through the prose and use the recipes, but this one was different. It explained the differences between food groups, how our ‘treats’ and food preferences are most often based upon manufacturers understanding our primitive minds. They create food we crave, hit our ‘sweet spot’ and we up our consumption thinking we enjoy it. A packet of crisps is a case in point: the more we eat, the more we crave. Science and marketing, pure and simple. The proof of this marketing brilliance is the increase in obesity in the western culture. Even being overweight is now acceptable, as there are so many much heftier people about to dilute the perceived lesser danger.

I have become sure that we no longer wean our children into a wonderful world of subtle and fantastic tastes, rather they tend to be hit with mighty junk food taste bombs. In a short period, a healthy diet becomes ‘bland’ and unappealing. It is hardly surprising. I grew up in the transition culture. From lots of exercise and unprocessed home cooking, to becoming adult and getting into the convenience food and social media driven world. Urgency in everything overtook gentle reflection. Food became something to stuff quickly in ones cake hole, and the taste bomb took the place of savouring new flavours. Thus, I too had weaned myself into bad habits, born of incipient junk food propaganda and chemical wizardry. So, The Reset: for the whole of 2021 I will live the adjustments I conceived and apply Martin’s strength and speed techniques. I invite you to watch what can happen if you reset your life by positivity and shrug off learned bad habits. At all times, remember I reached over 16 stones (225lbs/102kg) at the age of 52, so reaching this point has taken years of reflection, application and, at times, demoralisation. Also remember, I have the same cravings as any one and subconscious weaknesses to grab for a reward – junk food, booze and prolonged arse-sitting. I am human. I am 64. But I know older age can be loaded in our favour. My January overview will appear here very soon. 

A Racing the Reaper Man Year: January 2021

In my opening Blog Post introducing my Racing the Reaper Man Year, I explained how being fit but retaining unnecessary habits, kept me in a self-imposed Limbo of not quite resetting my life for the better: the pandemic had the same effect on me as everyone else. My stubborn final drive to run 1000 miles for 2020, covering 141 miles in December, liberally laced with red wine as a reward, changed my mindset. I decided to stop kidding myself and put my philosophy into action. Thus, armed with hindsight and moving firmly forward, I started to put my ideas into a year-long journey. This post is about my first month ‘being my own experiment’.

On January 1st I had reached my sixth day of running at least a mile, and I planned to keep that going for as long as having no excuses would let me. I gave up drinking ‘for a month’ and applied some heavy pruning to my diet. Butter was gone: it was replaced with finest olive oil. No refined sugar, chocolate, crisps, pies and those nutrition-free ‘treats’ the whole Western World are addicted to. In came grains, nuts, locally sourced fruit and veg, and 0% alcohol beer. My bread consumption dropped to a loaf of locally baked sourdough rye for the week. This was a ‘live’ learning curve which I intended to refine as I went, and I was dead-set to reject my diet if I found it awful. I have not eaten meat for years, but kept sustainable fish in, and retained only cheese as a dairy product – this sourced from Britain.

My aim is to reach certain targets as the year progresses and to report honestly how it affects me, and how my life changes. January was the reset month where I allowed myself time to adjust and make errors. So, on January 1st my starting point statistics were:

• Age 64
• Weight: 13st 5lbs (187lbs/84.8kg)
• BMI: 27.6
• Belly circumference: 38 inches/96.52cm

For years I have counted my daily calorific intake and for this year determined to consume no more than a ‘passive’ 2000kcal a day. This is not purely scientific, but without a laboratory and funding, I developed a rough benchmark to work from. It goes thus: using online calculators for calories burned whilst running, I found that I was projected to burn an extra 125 or 150 kcal per mile. I took a baseline figure of 130 kcal. So, I would count all my calories in through the day, then subtract 130 per mile ran as follows:

Running 6 miles eating 2000 calories: 2000 – (6×130) = 2000 – 780 = 1220 kcal day’s balance.

Not perfect, but far from cheating. If I stuck to 2000kcal a day and ran 40 miles a week, I would soon fall over. Trust me, it works very, very well. And, I will prove it this year.

I committed myself to a weekly core strength session with my Personal Trainer, Martin Sorenson. He is working on his MSc, so is going to use me as a small part of his work. On top of this, I would do a single core workout exercise each day, along with some shoulder strengthening and mobility exercise – I’d had a cortisone jab in my left shoulder to ease several years of pain from a damaged rotator cuff, and needed to bring it back to normal.

My targets are 12st 4lbs (172lbs/78kg) by May 1st; a couple of ultra-marathons; and try to crack a 7-minute mile by the end of the summer. My organised 50k was postponed until October, so I determined to run a solo time trial over the same distance in the spring.

How did I fare in January?

I started with the commitment of the newly converted, but was aware that this was not a short-term regime. I was prepared for self-doubt and negative thoughts surfacing as excuses. Yet, the longer I avoided booze, the easier it became. By the second week I had no craving at all. I remained true to my diet needs and there was no junk.  My daily food intake was averaging 1600kcal and I started to feel much better. In January I ran 116 miles – running every day. I had completed 4 x 11-mile long runs and was pleased to have been alcohol free for a month. Relevant stats:

• Age 64
• Weight: 13st 0lbs (182lbs/82.6kg) – down 5lbs/2.27kg
• BMI: Down from 27.6 to 26.9 
• Avg kcal/day = 1544

As I had been drinking too much in 2020, it came as a relief to commit to abstinence. My sleep pattern became erratic for a while, then, by the end of the month, had settled and I was getting proper rest. I began eating regularly in small amounts through the day, so I was never really hungry. My final meal of the day was no larger than 750kcal and eaten before 20:00. That way I effectively fasted for over 12 hours most days.

Core training once a week was initially hard, but as I started trimming down, I found exercise was becoming less of a burden – I was no longer training through a daily hangover. My runs were starting to be fun again, and photographing my progress for Facebook posts encouraged me to run as many varied routes as I could.

The first month was a test as everything was new. My mental processes were very strange as I would imagine excuses not to run automatically. It was as if my body and mind were conspiring against the change. However, once out in the cold I was fine, so one has to be aware of that inner voice. It stems from the primitive instinct not to expend energy, store fat and rest until the no-longer-relevant time of hardship arrives. That is the main message I have for January. Your stone age self has a built-in set of triggers designed to save energy. As modern humans we must override this, as energy stored as fat is no longer a requirement for survival, but its corruption is certainly a modern killer. Pressing the reset takes commitment, but it has been well within me so far. Contact me if you have any questions or comments.

A Racing the Reaper Man Year: February 2021

I started February with the echoes of a dry January filling my ears. I realised that, in being true to my aim – showing people what may be possible and reporting how I felt – I needed to take stock. Well, my whole body has changed, including the way my mind works. Initially I thought of alcohol a lot, especially my very favourite combination of a perfect day. Saturday: do a long run of 10+ miles, then buy a large haddock and large chips from my local chippy (superb by the way) and a good bottle of Malbec. Eat with mayonnaise. 2070kcal of bliss. The habit and action had become a mental totem I could barely resist. Yet, resist I did. By the third week in January I was no longer feeling deprived. By February, I no longer drooled at the thought of booze.

It took a month for my body to adjust to being without what I used to habitually put into it. And here was a stumbling block – a month did not denote success. It marked a single step to adjusting to my reset way of life. I made the logical decision to keep up the no drinking for another month, and to refine my eating habits. I now grazed through the day, eating the very healthiest, unprocessed food where possible. The result was I was seldom hungry and never went above a balance of 1600kcal a day. It was relatively simple. The main link I had broken, I have come to realise, is that between eating for the simple joy of good nourishment, and stuffing ‘bliss-point’ treats into my face without thought. I had stopped being a self-satisfying pig, put simply. The bonus of looking carefully at food, is my cooking skills in plant-based recipes have improved remarkably. I now ‘see’ food, rather than just grab for a taste bomb. I have come to realise that the only pleasure I had shoving junk in, was just that… after there was no pleasure. Now I’m not bloated, and I’m even starting to notice my body ‘asking’ for specific food. If I crave for a slice of bread with olive oil and tomato, it seems to come from a need for that type of nutrition. I’ve experienced this on mountains where the craving for fat is obvious. This is something I will examine as I go forward. Interesting.

At the start of the month I was called in for my first Covid-19 Pfizer vaccination. Two days later I was extremely tired on a 2-mile run, and coincidentally developed a boil on my back for which I needed antibiotics. I did short runs for the rest of that week, but by the weekend was fine. 

I ran every day of February as well, totting up 102 miles, with long runs of: 1 x 11 miles; 2 x 12 miles; and a glorious 13 miler up onto the South Downs. At 64, I’ve learned that shorter runs of 1 and 2 miles are very important for recovery after long runs. Recovery takes longer and getting injuries is easier. It is a fine balance. I hope that this experimental year finds me on the safer side of that line. The core work I do is a great help – I can feel that already. There are early indications that a layer of fat has been stripped from my legs, as my muscle definition has surprised me.

How did I fare in February?

• Age 64
• Weight: 12st 8lbs (176lbs/80kg) – down another 6lbs/2.8kg (11lbs/5kg in total)
• BMI: Down from 27.6 to 26.0
• Avg kcal/day = 1403

My Personal trainer, Martin Sorenson, decided to make me the main focus of his MSc work, so during the month we firmed up our plans to square with his project. So, I will continue to do weekly core training, but geared towards a weigh goal of 12st 4lbs (172lbs/78kg) by the end of April. We have set a 50k time trial for May 1^st with a target time between 6 hours and 6 hours 13 minutes. These goals will show how well the diet, training and strength work affects my running. (In addition, I finally caved in an purchased a smart watch to give me easier access to running statistics, freedom to run adjusted routes and see distance covered and a whole series of health monitoring readings. I chose the Garmin Forerunner 45, which turns out to suit me just fine.)

The hardest day was a Fitness VO2 Max test on 26^th: 1.5 miles at 8 min/mile pace, 25 pushups and 35 pull ups. It showed 43 – my fitness age was 28. Average heart Rate at rest 49.

So, February was a month of consolidation where the reset of January became more of an ingrained habit. The main take away is, I’m enjoying running much more.

A Racing the Reaper Man Year: March 2021

In March I stopped reflecting upon what I was missing when it came to my new dietary regime. I had become quite a Socratic thinker and questioned every intrenched desire, asking myself ‘Why?’ Why did specific foods seem to become treats or rewards? Why had booze become something that can control a person’s actions? Why do things that are bad for health, become something desirable? I had deciphered most of the answers during the previous few weeks, so the month of March became a proving ground for defusing dangerous subconscious programming and habits. I seemed to have broken through a very common mental blockage. All my planned adjustments were becoming a way of life and I was interested how March would pan out.

I extended my Dry January through February into March and still did not miss alcohol. The benefits of my new style of eating had been marked. I’m never hungry, am enjoying tasting new flavours and have found that knowing the nutritional values of the food I eat, helps me enjoy it even more. 

My training became more intense. Martin’s core workouts each week included 5 fast sprints, and lots of strength work, focusing on making me resilient to the needs of a 50k. Indeed, I was feeling very strong, and the most remarkable thing was I was losing my ever-present stomach. Each evening I would do shoulder exercises with light weights to strengthen and give flexibility to my recovering rotator cuff, and would add a single core workout at random. 

I increased my long runs through the month with 15, 16 and 18 milers being completed over varying terrains. I was still nervous about speed, but the Garmin Forerunner 45 gave me a boost I’d not perceived at first. My resting heart-rate was between 47 & 51 bpm, and showed my VO2 Max stayed at 43, improving to 44. With such a strong heart, and with very fast recovery from effort, I had no reason to worry about my main engine being fragile. My new regime had improved all my stats, so it was also the month to start testing my speed over distance.  

Being imperial in my running measurements, I selected a 3-mile course to see if I could find a racing pace. It had been so long since I had considered speed, I had no idea what I was capable of. My last timed run was a 4:30:48 marathon in 2019, so all I knew is I could maintain 10:20 pace two years ago. My first 3 miler was 28:32 (9:32 pace) which felt hard, but my third one near the end of the month was 26:18 – 8:46 pace was quite an improvement. However, with even bigger mileage coming, I shelved time trials for the following weeks. I completed 110 miles for the month and had not missed a day’s running since 27^th December 2020.

Out of the blue I was called in for my second Pfizer jab on the 28^th, the after-effects of which caused me to ease down for the following few days to the end of the month.

How did I fare in March?

• Age 64
  
• Weight progression:
  • Dec 31^st: 13st 5lbs
  • End Jan: 13st 0lbs
  • End Feb: 12st 8.2lbs
  • End Mar: 12st 4.8lbs
    
• BMI: Down from an initial 27.6 to 25.4
  
• Avg kcal/day balance = 1500
  
• Tummy: Down from an initial 38” in November, to 33”.

Being my own experiment, applying my accumulated knowledge to a whole year, was starting to show big improvements to my health and fitness. I had also started to use a set of ‘Smart’ Scales that gave me a whole suite of statistics, which I’ll cover more in April’s overview. The main thing I’d noticed was my visceral fat – the fat that men store around their organs, giving the classic gut – had dropped from 13 to 12.5%. Finally, after 20 years, my tummy was shrinking! 

After three months I had never felt deprived of anything and had started to build a new confidence. Distance didn’t worry me, but I was still wary of sustained pace. Yet, I was now running every day for enjoyment, and because I could find no real excuse not to. I had yet to complete a run feeling worse than when I started. Racing the Reaper Man, as a philosophy, had yet to fail under scrutiny. April was to be my toughest month yet.

A Racing the Reaper Man Year: April 2021

I have often written about Pressing the Reset. In the Racing the Reaper Man book, I intend to dedicate a whole chapter to this subject, but I will try and condense my meaning here. The shortest possibly explanation: it is changing all one’s detrimental habits to new, positive, healthier ones, making a permanent adjustment to have a fuller and fitter older age. It is easy to write this, but proof of my theory’s efficacy has needed a real, live subject. That subject is me. 

So far, the changes I made have been consciously followed and the temptation to grasp for hard wired comforts – booze, junk food, giving in to lounging about after a tough day – were a constant. I am no different to anyone, but my well-publicised experiment gave me the extra push to keep with the program. By April there was a sea change that had a direct influence on my progress. Put simply, the changes I had made, which had become ritualised with conscious effort, had become my way of life. I no longer thought of the changes as scripted. Indeed, I no longer thought of them at all. The Reset had kicked in. The net result of this was freedom. Freedom from the desire to eat crap; freedom from the desire for booze; freedom to fully accept my own commitment without being affected by naysayers. 

The changes in my body and general health were accelerating. My blood pressure was down, my weight continued to fall, and running was now a daily part of my life, not an addition. I no longer thought of having a rest, and had run a minimum of a mile for 127 continuous days without any negative effects. 

April was even more important as it was the month of my peak training weeks towards the 50k time trial I was running solo on 1^st May. On the 3^rd to 5^th April I ran a 10, 20 and 10 without ill effects. The following weekend a 22 miler which meant I had covered the best part of 74 miles in 9 days. Martin’s core sessions with sprints, each Wednesday, were hard, but never destructive. I was much stronger. I ran a final long run of 10 miles on 17^th April, then started to taper. The following day, on an easy 2-mile jog, I tripped and fell barely 700m from my house and cut up my left hand very badly! Two days later I sliced my third finger, right hand on a broken porcelain cup! Both nasty wounds that needed a series of dressings. I ran on…

Five days before the 50k, Martin put me through a fitness test: 1.5 miles at 8:11 pace followed immediately by 26 press ups and 41 pull ups. Brutal in its intensity, but I recovered quickly. The 50k was upon me, but that starts next month’s overview.

How did I fare in April?

• Age 64
  
• Weight progression:
  • Dec 31^st: 13st 5lbs
  • End Jan: 13st 0lbs
  • End Feb: 12st 8.2lbs
  • End Mar: 12st 4.8lbs
  • End Apr: 12st 4lbs
    
• BMI: Down from an initial 27.6 to 25.3
  
• Avg kcal/day balance = 1500
  
• Tummy: Down from an initial 38” in November, to 32”.

My weight was plateauing, but my tummy was still in retreat. I’d hit my target weight for the 50k. The strangest thing was the change in my mental processes. I sincerely could not understand why anyone would think my new lifestyle was boring or some kind of deprivation. I loved the food I was eating, loved the clarity of a sober mind, loved the way I have started to enjoy hard running again, and loved my new, slimmer body. A couple people told me I look ‘amazing for 64!” I couldn’t even understand that comment, in all honesty. As far as I am concerned, the only benchmark I have is me. I’m not special. I’m not a gifted sportsman. My running style is ‘industrial’ rather than refined. I have a few ailments common to people in my age group. To me, this is what 64 looks like. What are my limits? I have no idea, but I aim to explore that undiscovered country, to paraphrase Hamlet. So should we all, if we choose to.

A Racing the Reaper Man Year: May 2021

It was all well and good tracking my progress each month by weight and miles run, but I had a single, looming target that would show if, indeed, my new lifestyle would translate into a quick 50k. In the last week of April, I decided I needed one extra day’s rest to recover from the fitness test imposed upon me by Martin, and moved my 50k to Sunday 2^nd May. I reached the day weighing 12st 5lbs, a shade heavier than the previous few weeks, as I had been increasing my carbohydrate and liquid intake for several days. Yet, my weight was exactly what I had hoped it would be, and, most of all, I had tapered down and was well rested. 

It is so difficult to predict running times over a marathon, let alone over 31+ miles. In 2018 I tested myself over 30 miles and managed 6 hours 8 minutes, so that was all I had. Together, Martin and I had set out a wish list of times. Best: sub 6 hours = 11:35 pace. Mid: 6 hours 10 mins = sub 12:00 pace. Slowest: 6 hours 13 mins = 12:00 pace. To me these seemed like respectable times for a 64-year-old man.

As I lined up on that Sunday morning at the start of a 24 and-a-bit lap route I was apprehensive. Martin and my Passepartout, were there to support, but there was no field of runners to pull me along. To me, a solo time trial is always hard. 50k was new territory for me. Yet, it was a perfect day: sunny, but with a cool SW wind which would be behind me on the gentle climb of each lap. I wore sunglasses to ease my eyes, and had invested in some Hoka Carbon X shoes. As the countdown began, it was all up to me, and the efficacy of mine and Martin’s living experiment with very new training methods.

“Go!” Watches synched, Martin ran the first 300m with me to his van, then I was alone with my thoughts. Immediately I felt ‘right’ and decided to run instinctively, rather than with the watch, however fast or slow I was running. I hit mile 1 in 9:44, throttled back, did a 9:40, throttled back and started to run at the steadiest of paces I’d ever managed. Just above 10-minute miles and feeling fine.

We were not prepared for this as the plan was 11:30s, so it was a worried support team that watched me pass by on each 2.28-mile lap. Passepartout cycled a few laps with me, but I was deep in another world by 10 miles. I took liquid or gels most laps and by 20 miles I was still averaging about 10:08 pace! It was too late to ease back now, so just relaxed, slowed slightly and focused. I drifted through the Marathon at 10:11 pace and decided just to keep pushing. Insane! The only issue I had was a sore right nipple, so I ditched the vest for the last couple laps and finished in 5:18:33 – 10:15s for 50k! And I felt just fine.

A great start to the month and solid evidence that the application of my philosophy was working. For the record I lost just 2lbs in weight over the run.

For the rest of May I was in a dilemma. I had a 53 miler in my plans for June, but realised I wanted to test my speed, more than endurance. A family emergency made my mind up, so deferred my entry to 2022, and reduced my training in favour of resetting my mind to long-lost speed.

This suited Martin too, as his MSc would benefit from the change – he could show his program of strength, core and plyometric sessions would support speed as well as endurance. For me it was no longer working hard at endurance, but hurting myself to regain some of the speed I had ignored for years. By the last week of the month we had decided a fast 5k on 4^th July at Goodwood was a fine target, adding a series of attempts at getting close to breaking a 7-minute mile between the end of the month and 14^th July.

Even with lower mileage I still lost weight, breaking through the 12 stone barrier for the first time since 1998. I ended the month with a glorious 10-mile trail run around Thorney Island. I finally looked slim, felt confident and, most of all, was living a new lifestyle based on my own philosophy. I was becoming what I wanted to be and working towards that every day. I no longer looked for excuses.  I set a benchmark by running a mile time trial in 7:44 on 26^th May – I had a long way to go.

How did I fare in May?

• Age 64
  
• Weight progression:
  • Dec 31^st: 13st 5lbs
  • End Jan: 13st 0lbs
  • End Feb: 12st 8.2lbs
  • End Mar: 12st 4.8lbs
  • End Apr: 12st 4lbs
  • End May: 11st 12.4lbs
    
• BMI: Down from an initial 27.6 to 24.5
  
• Avg kcal/day balance = 1493
  
• Tummy: Down from an initial 38” in November, to 31”.

My racing the Reaper Man Year was not yet halfway through. The results, so far, have been astounding. June’s strength and speed work would be a new challenge for me. 

A Racing the Reaper Man Year: June 2021

The end of June marked the halfway point of my Racing the Reaper Man Year. There is no shadow of a doubt it was my most difficult month so far. The fast 50k I managed in May (5:18:33) marked a transition period. Rather than continuing with endurance-only training, I had a niggle – speed training hurt. I had been avoiding it for years as I felt I’d lost any semblance of fast times for good. But that was a cop out – I had to set new benchmarks as a 64-year old. So, I decided to change my focus to speed: a fast mile (I want to get close to 7 minutes) and 5k (aiming to get under 27 minutes). Thus, Martin my PT, adjusted my core work to include plyometrics and I added some speed sessions. In May I’d set the marker down with a 7:44.8 mile, and managed a 7:29.8 in mid-June, but could not improve and posted a 7:48.7 on the 30th. Was there anything wrong? 

Looking back at my training log, I can see no major issues. I did a couple hefty long runs of 10 and 13 miles, which I thoroughly enjoyed, and evened out my mileage to post 108 miles for June, and 675 total for the year, so far. Other elements had crept in. Physically I was still going in the right direction, but mental and emotional exhaustion had started to be seen in my training log comments. I had been managing the mental stresses from work, but some deep family related problems needed my input, and that added emotional pressure had an interesting, if unwanted, side-effect. I found excessive, multi-factorial life pressures can transfer to the physical me. When I ran that 7:48, I could not get into top gear, even though it was there. So, I’ve had to step back and regain a little control.

Life is a singular, linear event for each of us. Seeing that is difficult – mythology, opinion and self-delusion becomes a fog of baseless hope. Giving control to others, allowing imposed duties to drain you, is a deathly addiction. That is no way to live. After 6 months I have reached a point of clarity I had not expected. My diet is clean, my body lighter and leaner. Yet, it is my mind that is clearer. The gravity well of apathy, that inertia caused by hoping rather than doing, has gone. Thus, even though June was tough, I still stuck to my new lifestyle, sure that I would still be getting fitter, even if some people suggested I had taken things too far. Mind and body are connected, but I’ve found keeping up good habits at times of stress will carry you through. Excuses to give in are many fold, but grasping them is a betrayal of the self.

Was June a ‘wobble’? No. Just a coincidental confluence of negative events. I’ve still run every day since 27th December last year and cannot see me missing a day this year. I even had my only alcohol of 2021 on a trip away – a single bottle of ale – 2.5 units. It made me feel light headed, I didn’t like it much, so eschewed booze again to date. By the very end of June I had a little bit of bounce back in my legs as other pressures were managed or concluded. There was a chance that July would see me in mental and physical harmony again. There was a 5k race coming on 4th July… that would be very interesting.

How did I fare in June?

The stats are interesting as, though my weight remained fairly steady, I’ve marked some key points:

• The most hydrated I’ve ever been, so technically as heavy as I will be for a weigh in.
• % body fat lowest ever at 19.6
• % visceral fat lowest ever at 11.0
• Bone mass up a shade.
• Muscle mass much higher than ever.
• BMI: Down from an initial 27.6 to 24.4
• Avg kcal/day balance = 1493
• Tummy: Down from an initial 38” in November, to a steady 31”

Weight progression:

• Dec 31^st: 13st 5lbs
• End Jan: 13st 0lbs
• End Feb: 12st 8.2lbs
• End Mar: 12st 4.8lbs
• End Apr: 12st 4lbs
• End May: 11st 12.4lbs
• End June: 11st 11lbs

A Racing the Reaper Man Year: July 2021

July started with a race and ended in Shetland. I carried a drop in confidence with me from June, but stuck to a tried and tested fallback plan – just keep to my program and results will follow, even if feeling a bit flat. Work and family issues had taken its toll on my energy, but giving up is something I had stopped myself doing: it always seems to be an easy option, but the aftermath is crippling. At some point I knew my mood would lift and my body would reinvigorate my mind. It is this knowledge, that mood should never stop me exercising, indeed living, that keeps me going. It is an important key to my successful year so far and has worked for 7 months. I had discovered the link between body and mind, the Self, was a two-way street.

With Covid-19 restrictions, I turned up for a 5k race, on the 4th, at the classic Goodwood motor racing circuit, alone. No spectators allowed. I had run a 7:48.7 mile time trial the previous Wednesday, which was nearly 20 seconds down on my previous attempt, so I was unsure what the outcome would be. A few stretches and jogs – I had a bit of bounce! The atmosphere was infectious, so I thought I had a good chance of running well. A rolling start and I was cruising at 6:15/mile pace! Crazy, so I throttled back, relaxed and passed the mile just below 8, relaxed and settled for an 8:40, then put some effort in to clock 25:43! 08:19 pace. Once home, I found I had been first in the V60 category, so had won my first ever race too! Unexpected, but further indication that my Racing the Reaper Man Year was still working.

There would be no let up, as Martin’s MSc project was finishing with a full fitness test on 14th, so I continued with speed and strength work, my weight dropping to a new low of 11st 9lbs (163lbs/73.9kg). I have to admit that full time work with months of focused training was not easy, and definitely not sustainable, so I was eyeing an active rest period in the second half of the month. On 14th I was nervously pacing at the start of my mile time trial course, as agitated as ever, but aiming to concentrate on form and style, rather than just brutal flat out running. Martin had driven to the end to wait. He was after data and reminded me that we had already achieved far more than we had expected, so the time was only relevant to the workload. For me, the time I would run was important. Even at 64, I knew I should be closer to 7 minutes than 8. I always felt the weight of my own expectation…

Away! I did concentrate on form, striding, straight backed and trying to control my breathing. I glanced at my watch a few times and at one point it showed 6:24 pace, so I eased back. This time I held form beyond the halfway point. Digging in I felt myself slowing and my form fell away, but I rallied, dodged a big tractor and stopped the watch at 7:24.6… my fastest mile since 2011. I recovered quickly, then Martin drove me to the gym where I went through a few other exercises, ending in a set of 6 squats with 85kg… some 11kg above my body weight. That was it. The planned year had reached the end of Martin’s MSc work, and I was still improving. 

It was time to rest a little, so, with my Passepartout, we set out to the Shetland Islands, where we ran every day, but reduced the intensity and I stopped core work. I ran my furthest north, for a mile on Unst, at Hermaness. On the islands we stayed at Burrastow House, the best possible setting way out at Walls. Pierre Dupont was a fine chef, using local ingredients where possible and furnished us with find breakfasts and superb evening meals. High in equality, low in fats, all vegetarian or pescatarian. I never exceeded a 1700kcal average for my whole trip.

The lesson I was learning at this point is that one needs to trust a proven system. For the Racing the Reaper Man Year I had put myself under pressure, so I always had the nagging feeling that resting would see me balloon up to a huge weight and my fitness would collapse. This, of course is not so. By continuing to stick to my new lifestyle, even when easing off, my body reacted the same. My weight was still drifting down, my fitness remained at a high level.

We kept our streaks going as we travelled back, putting in a mile here and there as I completed over 2000 miles of driving. This took me to the end of July, and the final days of the Shetland trip drifted into August… and August is another month.

How did I fare in July?

The stats are interesting as, though my weight remained fairly steady, I’ve marked some key points:

• The most hydrated I’ve ever been, so technically as heavy as I will be for a weigh in.
• % body fat lowest ever at 19.6
• % visceral fat lowest ever at 11.0
• Bone mass up a shade.
• Muscle mass higher than ever.
• BMI: Down from an initial 27.6 to 24.4
• Avg kcal/day balance = 1493
• Tummy: Down from an initial 38” in November, to a steady 31”

Weight progression:

• Dec 31^st: 13st 5lbs
• End Jan: 13st 0lbs
• End Feb: 12st 8.2lbs
• End Mar: 12st 4.8lbs
• End Apr: 12st 4lbs
• End May: 11st 12.4lbs
• End June: 11st 11lbs
• End July: 11st 9lbs

A Racing the Reaper Man Year: August 2021

I drifted into Sunday 1st August at sea. We were travelling from Lerwick, Shetland and the MV Hjaltland ferry arrived at Aberdeen and it was an early disembarking. Here, I had my first ever car accident – the crew at Lerwick had pondered and sent me down a very narrow ramp to the bottom deck. It was tight. On the way back up, the 1cm gap either side of my front wheels narrowed even more at a fishplate connector… up she went and hit the bulkhead. After much ado, we got her topside, reviewed the damage (not serious, but cosmetically ugly on a new car) then we were away through Aberdeen. Not bad, I had my first ever car bump at sea! (Within two hours, the fine people at Mazda had sorted a timetable for repairs and a courtesy car – so the stress was minimal.) We ran a mile at the Glenlivet Estate, then travelled on to my brother’s house at Dunphail. A couple days later we were home.

I kept the training going through August but lost my way a bit. I did not have a dip in training, it was just that I only had a rough idea of my next target. I managed 125 miles for the month, but only two runs above 10 miles. Yet, I put in several good speed sessions, felt strong, then challenged Martin, my trainer, to a 10 minute plank-off (autocorrect nearly exploded with that one)  before my birthday in September. By the end of August I could hold an 8 minute plank. Martin was busy putting together the final papers for his MSc and I had had a holiday, so my core sessions had no clear goal. I had lost my rhythm. With the quest for speed and October’s 50k looming, I had fallen between two stools and my training was neither speed nor endurance specific. However, I was still adhering to my new lifestyle, both dietarily and physically, by running every day. In Shetland I had drunk a bit of alcohol, but once home I stopped easily enough. The net result was a raised resting heart rate of 53-56 bpm, which slowly dropped to my normal 47-49 over the final weeks of August. However, I was still sticking to the same formula and my weight dropped to a new low of 11st 7lbs. 

Running wise I was very strong and seemed to have a new, built in endurance. My body was trim and new clothes were a couple sizes smaller. I was sure this Racing the Reaper Man Year would become my future normality and lifestyle. August was the month where I would let go of my weekly weighing and statistical gathering for a while. I needed a rest of sorts and by month’s end I had decided to focus on October’s 50k. August had been a month of adjustment and September would be a month of active rest. My right hamstring was a bit tight and my right shoulder had picked up a twinge. Work had become intense and I was losing more weekends with family commitments now the coronavirus restrictions were starting to lift. 

I had become a little too obsessed with a hard regime and irrationally worried that any easing back would see me balloon in weight. So, this was a new lesson: a successful program needs periods of low intensity. During these periods the good work already applied will stay with you as long as the balance of calories remain level, and old, bad habits don’t crawl back. Content with my new plans I looked forwards to September in which I was off to Greece and would also reach my 65th birthday. On a whim I also decided to get to 1000 miles for the year before my birthday to add to my 10 minute plank attempt, my goal of reaching 11st 5lbs and I was now committed to running every day of 2021 too. There is always something to aim for.

How did I fare in August?

My weight remained fairly steady, but still drifting down. I’ve marked some key points:

• Still the most hydrated I’ve been, so still as heavy as I will be for a weigh in.
• % body fat lowest ever at 19.4
• % visceral fat lowest ever at 11.0
• Bone mass down a shade.
• Muscle mass level.
• BMI: Down from an initial 27.6 to 23.8
• Avg kcal/day balance = 1584
• Tummy: Down from an initial 38” in November, to a new low of 30”

Weight progression:

• Dec 31^st: 13st 5lbs
• End Jan: 13st 0lbs
• End Feb: 12st 8.2lbs
• End Mar: 12st 4.8lbs
• End Apr: 12st 4lbs
• End May: 11st 12.4lbs
• End June: 11st 11lbs
• End July: 11st 9lbs
• End Aug: 11st 7lbs

A Racing the Reaper Man Year: September 2021

September started with a heatwave. After the decision to focus on the 50k in October, I suddenly realised that I had no easy way to prepare. After two years of pandemic-limiting travel, a holiday in Greece would take up half the month.  So, after two early-in-the-month long runs of 12 and 10 miles, all I could do was rely on my built in fitness and run every day. A couple of big core sessions with Martin, including 60m sprints, kept my strength tuned, and our self-imposed 10-minute plank-off happened on the 8th. My weight had levelled off to a new low of 11st 6.8lbs, which surprised me. My system was still working.

I had started to realise that September and October were evolving into ‘active rest’ months. In view of my self-experiment, I decided to see what happened if I just kept up my training, but ditch the formal data gathering until November. I felt I needed to simulate those times when discipline ebbs a little, the body needs a bit of recovery time and living my basic philosophy. I would test my built in fitness and allow some, now controlled, old habits to raise their heads. All of this came at a time when Martin was completing his MSc work and I had a series of commitments that would exclude a formal training schedule. Thus, I hurtled towards October’s 50k, more in hope than in confidence.

My resting pulse rate had raised in my July Shetland journey – the taking of alcohol did that – from 48/49 to 54/55. In September I was back to normal, and before my journey with Passepartout to Alónnisos, was running well. My running streak was now up to 250+ days and I had decided to keep it going to the end of the year, then beyond. The journey to Alónnisos would make that daily run difficult as it started at 01:50 in the morning! All went to plan, journey wise, and at 16:00 or so, local time, we stepped from the hydrofoil onto the quay on Alónnisos. We were both knackered, but both on a streak, so motivation overcame weariness. We ran a mile together in the intense heat of a Greek heatwave, to make our British heatwave earlier in the month pale into insignificance.

There followed two happy weeks. We ran every day and I managed some very hilly trail runs across the island, up to 6 miles in length. On Alónnisos steep hills are unavoidable. My legs coped very well on the hills and I felt the training would keep my fitness high. Yet again, whilst away from home, I drank wine with the evening meals. My resting pulse slowly rose, exacerbated by the heat, to around 56 bpm. To my great joy I also hit a new target before my 65th birthday. We took a taxi ride to the high village of Chora, and in running down the 2.5 miles to the harbour, I reached 1000 miles for the year.

The journey home involved a very early start again, but it was straightforward and we ran a tired mile to my local orchard and trails. The following day I had my 65th birthday. The difference between this and my 64th was marked: 28lbs (12.7kg) lighter, 8” smaller around the middle and much hairier! I ran a mile and drank some wine – my first imbibing of alcohol in the house this year. Thereafter, I resumed the application of my Racing the Reaper Man Year lifestyle, which had become my new normality. I topped 100 miles for the tenth month in a row and viewed October with some uncertainty. I had 2 weeks to prepare for a 50k.

How did I fare in September?

My weight remained fairly steady, but still drifting down. I’ve marked some key points:

• Still the most hydrated I’ve been, so still as heavy as I will be for a weigh in.
• % body fat still low at 19.8
• % visceral fat lowest ever at 11.0
• Bone mass down a shade.
• Muscle mass level.
• BMI: Down from an initial 27.6 to 23.7
• Avg kcal/day balance = 1689 – a rise showing fewer longer runs.
• Tummy: Down from an initial 38” in November, to a new low of 30”

Weight progression:

• Dec 31^st: 13st 5lbs
• End Jan: 13st 0lbs
• End Feb: 12st 8.2lbs
• End Mar: 12st 4.8lbs
• End Apr: 12st 4lbs
• End May: 11st 12.4lbs
• End June: 11st 11lbs
• End July: 11st 9lbs
• End Aug: 11st 7lbs
• End Sept: 11st 6.8lbs

A Racing the Reaper Man Year: October 2021

My Racing the Reaper Man Year October looked chaotic. After a fairly regimented eight months of success after success, with very few blips, I had just left the ninth, September, where such discipline was removed. I had done this for three reasons. First, I wanted to simulate those moments where rest is required and old, bad habits may creep in. Second, I was wanted to see how my trip to Alónnisos would affect the coming 50k. Would my ‘stored’ fitness see me through? Would the two-month break in routine, start to undo all my hard work? Finally, my body was starting to accumulate several aches that were difficult to shake off, so it needed a little less pressure: it needed to be allowed to rebuild a bit. To make my self-experiment authentic, I had to test it from every possible pressure anyone else may experience. It would be pointless to extol the virtues and efficacy of a change in lifestyle, if I could not show the value of it in those times where a human being feels fed up. To add to the unsettled nature of the previous 4 weeks, work pressure reached a maximum, so this also affected my discipline. The results were intriguing to me.

The first thing to creep up on me was fear of the scales! I was deliberately stopping regular weigh-ins on my ‘intelligent’ scales to remove a benchmark. My system would have to go blind for eight weeks or so. In the meantime, I would continue daily calorie management, daily running and, by the third week of October, a complete resumption of my more regimented lifestyle. By October 28th, I had become fearful of what the scales would reveal. But, I’m ahead of myself.

Once home from Alónnisos, with only two weeks to go before the 50k, I had to compress some useable training into 7 days. I ran 36 miles, which included a 7 mile trail run, a 10, an 11 and a 9:22 min/mile 5.5 miler. The final week consisted of gentle daily jogs. I travelled with my Passepartout to the Spyglass and Kettle Inn at Southbourne, Bournemouth, the Friday before the ultra. I had no confidence, as I had not trained further than 12 miles in a single run since July. In the dark, with drizzly rain I parked and made my way to the waiting coaches at Hengistbury Head. It was with some trepidation that I looked at the dark, wet roads to the distant start. However, once at Moors Valley Country Park near Ringwood, it was dry, with a mist in the air – it was humid. After much faffing about, I started with the 07:45 wave…

My right hamstring had been tight behind my knee joint, so, even as I settled into 10:10 pace, I was far from happy. Yet, after the first feed stop, I had found my sustainable rhythm. Lots of people passed me for the first 15 miles, but then I held my position. At 16 miles I tripped on a root and rolled gymnastically, regaining my feet with not a scratch! I was applauded by a couple of chaps behind me, and carried on, giggling as I went… Hang on… by 18 miles I realised my hamstring was much better – the fall seemed to have cured it! As the trails gave way to proper paths and roads around Poole Harbour the sun was out and I was feeling hot. I was also passing more and more runners. I’d drank at each of the 3 feed stations, but relied on my caffeine gels to give me the occasional boost. I had 3. After 20 miles my 10:10 pace had dropped to just under 11s. The final 9 miles were run in warm sunshine against cliffs and built up sea defences, magnifying the heat.

I started to pass a lot of runners, many stretching out cramping calf muscles. My own right calf started to cramp in response to where I’d been favouring my hamstring, so my pace slowed again. At the 26 mile checkpoint, I made the error of drinking chilled water, set off running but immediately got stomach cramps… a 14 minute mile showed I had to walk a little to settle my innards and avoid vomiting. Off I set again running under 12s, but my calf locked solid several times, slowing up my progress. I managed to keep moving and crossed the line in exactly 5:54:00 which translated as 11:18 pace. I was 222 out of 532 and 6th over 60.

I took it easy for the rest of the week, then threw in a 31 mile week to end the month with a 9:22 paced 4.5 miler to show I’d recovered. I was still running every day and still keeping my average daily calories under 2000. I weighed myself at the end of the month and was happy enough with 11st 12lbs (166lbs/75.3kg) as my body had rebuilt a bit. The ultra showed I could carry built-in fitness with me, and also that niggles need not become injuries. I continued with my core sessions and remained pleased with my strength and flexibility.

My Racing the Reaper Man Year had delivered a lot of self-knowledge and data. November was a month to rebuild my fitness level for a December 5k. Unbeknownst to me, it would be my most testing month so far.

How did I fare in October?

My weight remains fairly steady, but, as expected, drifted up 5.4lbs. I’ve marked some key points:

• Still the most hydrated I’ve been, so still as heavy as I will be for a weigh in.
• % body fat up a little at 21.3
• % visceral fat up slightly at 12.0
• Bone mass: level.
• Muscle mass: level.
• BMI: Down from the initial 27.6 to 23.7, now just up to 24.5
• Avg kcal/day balance = 1720 – the highest average this year; a rise showing fewer longer runs and the introduction of alcohol back into the last 8 weeks.
• Tummy: Up from the steady 30” up to September, to 31”

Weight progression:

• Dec 31^st: 13st 5lbs
• End Jan: 13st 0lbs
• End Feb: 12st 8.2lbs
• End Mar: 12st 4.8lbs
• End Apr: 12st 4lbs
• End May: 11st 12.4lbs
• End June: 11st 11lbs
• End July: 11st 9lbs
• End Aug: 11st 7lbs
• End Sept: 11st 6.8lbs
• End Oct: 11st 12.2lbs

A Racing the Reaper Man Year: November 2021

November became a month where I was hit with a modern health problem – poor mental health. After 22 months of managing all things coronavirus-related, the possibility of a new variant in the winter period became a reality. My in-depth preparation for reducing such risk to the workforce, along with other duties, meant I’d finally started to show signs of stress. A few colleagues had noticed, but keeping people safe has always been my professional priority. I naively let my own wellbeing take a back seat. I was running well enough, but without a solid, new goal to aim for, barring a 5k in December, I found myself completely engrossed in work, some weeks being in front of the computer for 60 hours. Such is the gravity-well of an uncontrolled, thankless corporate life. It was only at the end of the month that I realised I had broken one of my main, Racing the Reaper Man Year rules – never let work encroach upon one’s everyday private life.

Normally I could run and switch off, but somewhere in November, unnoticed by me, I had slipped over the stress-event-horizon and was showing signs of burnout. My running remained easy and my body was still lean. I ran strong 10 and 12 milers in the month, extending my streak to 339 days, but my running log started to show my problems. Booze had crept back in. After October’s 50k success, I had started to alleviate my increasing work pressures by drinking more wine. Finally, during a short break on the Isle of Portland, I went down with a virus for the first time in 2 years (fortunately, it was not Covid-19) a sure sign things were very wrong. I decided not to run the December 5k and to concentrate instead on sifting out unhealthy habits. The only plus in all this was having more data to show the deleterious affect of alcohol.

By month’s end, I was still lighter than my end-of-year target, but my mental health was under terrible strain. In addition, a prostate issue, with me since 2016, was causing ever-greater discomfort, so I would have to have an MRI scan to see what was brewing. Family problems, normally taken in my stride, became huge in my mind. I was losing sleep, transfixed by work and desperately trying to hold everything together.

The odd thing was, running was still easy – of course, it was my only stress-relief. Core work remained important, too: I shaved my 10 x 60m sprint average times to 11.39 seconds. The shorter days meant I was running into sunsets once more. I’ll never tire of watching the Earth turn, seeing the seasons change and running through it all. This one life is to live to the full, not to waste by mistaking comfort for fulfilment, presuming owning things is success, or assuming allegiance to one of the 6000 gods men invented will give you a second chance. My philosophy gives me no place to hide. All well-and-good, but it was the pressure from other, less kind people, that eventually did for me.

Thus, November supplied more lessons which will eventually find their way into my book. My annual mileage had reached 1254 miles, again well in excess of my target, and I naively decided that December would be my reset month to charge towards 1400 in total. What could possibly stop me? Well, in the end, everything.

How did I fare in November?

My weight remains fairly steady, drifting down to up 11st 11lbs (165lbs/74.8kg). I’ve marked some key points:

• Still the most hydrated I’ve been, so still as heavy as I will be for a weigh in.
• % body fat up a little at 21.3
• % visceral fat up slightly at 12.0
• Bone mass: level.
• Muscle mass: level.
• BMI: Down from the initial 27.6 to 23.7, now just up to 24.5
• Avg kcal/day balance = 1715 – a little lower than October:  but, a lot more of these were due to the reintroduction of alcohol. The quality of my fuel was going down.
• Tummy: settled at 31”

Weight progression:

• Dec 31^st: 13st 5lbs
• End Jan: 13st 0lbs
• End Feb: 12st 8.2lbs
• End Mar: 12st 4.8lbs
• End Apr: 12st 4lbs
• End May: 11st 12.4lbs
• End June: 11st 11lbs
• End July: 11st 9lbs
• End Aug: 11st 7lbs
• End Sept: 11st 6.8lbs
• End Oct: 11st 12.2lbs
• End Nov: 11st 11lbs

A Racing the Reaper Man Year: December 2021

I entered December stumbling through a fog of incomprehension: the harder I tried to focus, the iller and more tired I became. I had marked the very first day of December as a line in the sand, beyond which I would regain my strength by pushing through the mental treacle and heroically chasing the 147 miles needed to hit 1400 miles for the year. I was always physically capable of that… surely? Such moments of energetic light and drive had become rare, and I had yet to fully comprehend that my battery was beyond empty. I had a virus, still. An annoying, debilitating light-headedness and a dry cough. Fortunately it was not Covid-related.

At the start of the second week, I was sitting in front of my computer and my vision stopped working. My mind could no longer comprehend the words, numbers and endless emails. Everything was a-blur and my right armpit started to sweat profusely. Minutes went by… then I came to. The penny dropped. I called my local doctors’ surgery and, after some very kind attention, managed to talk to the same GP who had guided me back to health in 2017. He signed me off immediately and had no hesitation in diagnosing burnout. That one word, oft misunderstood, became my reality.

The following two weeks were very dark. I had often been sceptical in the past about such conditions, but the physical and mental manifestation of burnout are truly terrifying. I could not rest. My mind chased endless doom-laden paths unbidden and nightmares in the form of flashbacks filled my restless head. I was scared to sleep as there was less control over my mind than when awake. Consciousness and unconsciousness were equally exhausting. Work was stuck in my mind, along with worries about my prostate, my family and my own mortality. Mortality had never worried me, but now I awoke relieved to still be here, then immediately my day-fears began. This is a rough idea of my own burnout symptoms.

After 2 weeks, I was signed off again for a month and prescribed sleeping tablets. For a couple days I started to relax, and then, right out of the blue felt the sudden urge to run hard. Maybe I could exorcise by exercise? I blasted out a 9:24 pace 10 miler and my head cleared. I’d not stopped my running streak, but this was the first indication I was still physically well. My fastest 10 for a decade! Yet, I was so tired and the pills did not work. I ran another 10 to try the same trick, but that would be it for several weeks. I was still in the middle of a mental crash and nothing was stopping the downward spiral. It was the lack of control that frightened me.

Maybe Christmas would bring some respite, I thought. My Passepartout arrived on 22nd, and for the first time ever, we started a festive period with just the two of us. A quiet few days were planned with some short runs and walks. The subconscious hum of my illness drifted into the background and I was finally feeling hopeful. My MRI Scan had been scheduled for January and there was always less pressure at this time of year.

On the morning of Christmas Eve my sister-in-law died. My younger brother, alone and distraught, needed me – he had no one else to turn to. Christmas stopped. I could not travel on Christmas Day as nothing was open, so Boxing Day was spent packing the car, and we set off for Scotland for a two-day trip. I had no choice. Such is love, such is duty.

For a week we supported a grieving man as best we could. I spent days sorting paperwork, important documents, forming a strategy and helping with the legal requirements of a sudden death in Scotland. I ran a short distance at the end of each day at the point I could no longer make sense of documents. We would call a halt, raise a glass of sherry to the lovely Sue, then try to fill the early Scottish evening with hope. I was now beyond-burnout. In fact, I had become a machine running on banked fitness.

This is where my planned Racing the Reaper Man Year ended. We did not notice 2022 arrive and I was 750 miles from home surrounded by sadness. Somewhere in my tired mind, I decided to extend my self-experiment into 2022, thus starting a Racing the Reaper Man to Ultra year. This way I could catalogue my recovery and my drive towards my first ever 100k.

December’s blog has been a very personal one. I decided to be as candid as possible to show my readers that everyone has barriers and pressures to overcome, both mental and physical. Holistic pressure, if you will. My book will only contain things I have experienced. That way it will remain authentic. In all this, running/exercise, fitness and health remain the greatest gift you can give yourselves. I will tie up my journey home and an overview of 2021 in the next blog, and also outline the next stretch to ultra.

In the meantime, keep safe and be kind.

How did I fare in December?

Ultimately, I took no real data. Thus I just revise my November figures. My weight remained fairly steady through the autumn, so 11st 11lbs (165lbs/74.8kg) remains my end-of-year touchpoint:

• Still the most hydrated I’ve been, so still as heavy as I will be for a weigh in.
• % body fat 21.3
• % visceral fat  12.0
• Bone mass: level.
• Muscle mass: level.
• BMI: Down from the initial 27.6 to 23.7, now just up to 24.5
• Avg kcal/day balance = 1479 – much lower than October and November: but, a lot more of this remained empty alcohol calories. The quality of my fuel was still going down. December was a month where burnout affected everything.
• Tummy: settled at 31”

Weight progression:

• Dec 31^st: 13st 5lbs
• End Jan: 13st 0lbs
• End Feb: 12st 8.2lbs
• End Mar: 12st 4.8lbs
• End Apr: 12st 4lbs
• End May: 11st 12.4lbs
• End June: 11st 11lbs
• End July: 11st 9lbs
• End Aug: 11st 7lbs
• End Sept: 11st 6.8lbs
• End Oct: 11st 12.2lbs
• End Nov: 11st 11lbs
• End Dec: 11st 11lbs

A Racing the Reaper Man Year 2021 and Onwards to Ultra

On New Year’s Day, 2022, I had planned to write up a review of my Racing the Reaper Man Year. That I would be in Scotland, supporting my newly widowed brother, whilst fighting burnout and anxious about my physical health, was never in the plan. But, that is life, and we can never know what will happen to change the most well strategised journey. However, rather than having a neat year of benchmarked successes, I found reality had tested my self-experiment to limits I had never imagined.

The idea was always to apply years of running and fitness lessons to a single, designated year and see what a healthy, balanced, exercise-based adjustment into older age would do for me. By year’s end I had also been able to see what a fit body could do to carry me through mental illness and some worrying physical issues with my prostate. At 65, such issues are not rare for a chap, but the affects can be exhausting. Indeed, at time of writing I’m still in the middle of things, so I had to decide what to do as regards writing. In the end I have determined to add more months to myself-experiment, remain candid and weave my recovery and quest for a first 100k ultra in June. So, in this month’s blog I’m tying up my Racing the Reaper Man Year and segueing it into Racing the Reaper Man to Ultra.

Racing the Reaper Man Year: 2021 – the results

My blog posts give the in-depth, month-by-month details of 2021, so this is a general synopsis of the results. In January 2021 I weighed at least 13st 5lbs (187lbs/85kg), with a BMI 27.6 and a belly circumference of 38 inches (96.52cm). I had always been a regular runner and considered myself to be in reasonable shape for a 64-year-old. Yet, I knew I had given in to accepting how I looked and that older age would mark a gentle decline in my powers. The end of 2020 gave me the shake-up I had needed, I had to run 141 miles in December to reach my annual benchmark of 1000 miles and in doing so realised I could possibly improve several levels. Could I drop my weight and waistline significantly? Would my running improve because of it? As my book, Racing the Reaper Man would depend on living my own philosophy in full, and in the public domain, I determined to take a disciplined approach to the year and the following, basic rules evolved:

• Run every day, a minimum of a mile, to instill running as a normal way of life. In doing this, even when travelling, I would automatically find excuses to run, rather than not to run.

• Keep my balance of food intake below 2000 a day:

Using ‘online calories burned whilst running’ calculators, I found that I was projected to burn an extra 125 and 150 kcal per mile. I took a baseline figure of 130 kcal. So, I would count all my calories in through the day, then subtract 130 per mile ran as follows: Running 6 miles eating 2000 calories: 2000 – (6×130) = 2000 – 780 = 1220 kcal day’s balance. Not an absolute science, but trust me, it works very, very well.

• Keep meat-free and be 80% plant-based.

• Get below 12st by the end of the year.

• Make core strength work an integral part of my year.

As a basic tenet, I felt the following goals were achievable:

• 1200 miles for the year.

• Compete in at least one 50k with the aim of getting below 6 hours.

• Noticeably improve my racing pace and seeing if running at sub-10 minutes a mile could become normal.

In addition to my commitment to running, my personal trainer, Martin Sorenson, chose me as his subject for attaining his MSc… between us we would see how core strength and conditioning would aid my goals.

By the end of January, I had run every day and, once this streak was in place, it became harder to drop. Thus, I continued right through the year, running a mile on travelling days, even stopping the car on long drives to get that mile in. At the time of writing, I’m aiming to continue through 2022 and beyond. The great advantage to this was running became part of everyday life, not an addition to it. It became an added incentive, so I added another. Could I do a whole year of topping 100 miles for every month? I did, with room to spare.

I managed to keep my daily balance of calories below 1600, and proved that excess calories are not required for modern life. Avoiding alcohol for long stretches, keeping to a meat-free, mainly plant-based diet and reducing dairy intake to cheese only, saw my weight drop off. I hit 11st 6.8lbs at my lightest, and kept well below 12st for the rest of the year. My BMI of 24.5 was healthy, and my belly stayed between 30” and 31”. Effectively, I was very close to my 1986 stats. At 65, I had shifted all the excess weight I’d gotten used to, and proved it could be done.

To put this into further context, my food became better, more delicious and the smell of meat and fast food is now nauseating to me. I had pressed a restart and weaned myself properly. My physical health improved and I was able to maintain a resting heart rate of 48-49 bpm.

The core workouts did not build excess muscle. They did, however, make my muscles stronger, my muscle mass % rise and my flexibility greater. At my lighter weight I could squat 85kg, hold a 10 minute plank and run up hills without stress.

Everything came together in a 5:18:33 50k on a loop course near my home. That was 10:15 minutes a mile for over 31 miles! At 64. I even ran 25:43 for 5k and won my 60-64 age group (8:20/mile pace). These are not world-class times, but very respectable.

Later in the year, at 65, I ran a trail 50k in 5:54:00 in hot weather. Then, in December blasted out a 1:34 10 miler to show I could hold 9:30 pace over distance. This was the fastest I’d run for decades. I managed to run above 100 miles every month and ended the year on 1358 miles.

So, my self-experiment of the Racing the Reaper Man Year proved to me that regaining what one has lost is possible. It comes down to want. You are what you want to be. To change, the want must be driven by desire to change permanently. Was it easy? No. I’m a human being with all the same frailties. In fact, by November things were not good in my working and personal life. It was sticking to the basics that has helped me through. I am now confident that my book will be based on fact, not hope, personal results, not borrowed data.

Racing the Reaper Man Year: 2021 – the stats

• Total miles: 1358
• Ave weekly miles: 26.11
• Run streak 370 days from 27-12-20
• All 12 months above 100 miles
• Weight at end of year 11st 11lbs
• Ave daily calorie balance: 1592
• Ave resting heart rate: 48-49bpm
• Waist: 31”
• Best mile 7:24.6
• Best 5k: 25:43
• Best 10k: 57:13
• Best Marathon: 4:27:08
• Best 50k: 5:18:33

All the above were after-effects of training for the fast 50k, rather than planned events. It shows plenty of room for improvement across the board. Now I need to maintain this new lifestyle and focus on honing my race times down. My diet was spot on and my training has found the correct, long-term balance. A healthy lifestyle is not a burden, but gives one freedom to live a full life into older age.

Racing the Reaper Man to Ultra – 2022

I left a lot of things in midair at the end of my December 2021 blog post. I was miles from home, ill and exhausted. Thus, because I had hit a hard patch, I had to find a way to show my philosophy, my basic tenet in staying physically fit, would hold me in good stead. So, as I prepare the outline to my book, Racing the Reaper Man, I am extending my self-experiment to June of 2022. This will see me through to my first ever 100k, the Race to the King. These additional months will show my readers how life’s common hurdles can be overcome.

My aim is to reduce my weight to 11st 4lbs (158lbs/71.6kg), complete the 100k and try to improve my racing speed once more. So, my next blog post will be Racing the Reaper Man to Ultra – January 2022.

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